BADASS MINDSET PODCAST

Unlock your secret 'success triggers' and make goal crushing feel EFFORTLESS!

• Lacy Wafer • Season 2 • Episode 48

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Ever wondered why some people achieve their goals effortlessly while others struggle to stay consistent? Get ready to uncover the secret sauce in this episode as we talk allll about "hinging points" – game-changing TRIGGERS that can transform your journey to success!!

Inspired by the insights of MY mindset coach, Peter Shaw (@scaryandexciting on Insta), we’ll dissect how these cues will help you stay on track with your BIGGEST ambitions, and NEVER fall off AGAIN.

Don't just take it from me, take it from my previous health and wellness coaching client, and friend, who has completey transformed her weight loss journey and achieved what feels like effortless consistency and results for the first time in her entire life. (Her words, not mine)

I'm breaking down many different types of hinging points that you will probably resonate with, and that will absolutely light a fire under your motivation! Whether it's the camaraderie of a community, the thrill of competition, the structure of accountability, or the simplicity of convenience, understanding these triggers can revolutionize how you approach your goals.

With practical examples tailored to areas like health, relationships, and career aspirations, you'll learn how to leverage these elements to build enduring habits that lead to remarkable achievements, no matter what area of your life you want to transform!

This episode is your ALL-INCLUSIVE guide to consistent self-improvement. Just press play! And remember babe, your dedication to your health and well-being deserves CELEBRATION – Like, seriously. You showing up for yourself like this is a HUGE deal!!

Connect with me over on Instagram (@boldlylacy and @badassmindsetpodcast) and share your Top 2-3 hinging points or what resonates with you most from this episode. Let’s recognize your strength and commitment to becoming the amazing person you aspire to be!

Share a personal story or submit a question you'd like answered in a future episode!

❤️‍🔥SUBSCRIBE to the podcast for weekly tips and insights to fuel your journey!⚡️

❤️‍🔥Add us on IG & TikTok @badassmindsetpodcast & @boldlylacy to connect deeper + ignite your journey and keep your growth game on point!!🤘🚀 Let’s goooo!

Speaker 1:

Hey boo, I just wanted to pop in before today's episode and let you know that I know I've been talking about having an updated, new and improved intro coming here, but it's not quite ready yet. I'm not there yet and if you're like, what are you talking about? Never heard you say that before. I've been talking about it over on Instagram. So if you're not over on Instagram with me yet, I'm at boldlylacy or at badass mindset podcast. Add me on both. It's linked in the show notes. But anyways, I'll give you an update as soon as I'm ready. I just literally have not had a second to sit down and breathe yet, outside of all of the other things I have going on, but I have time next week or this week, I guess, if you're listening to this the day that it comes out, i've've got time this week, so you can expect next Monday's episode to have the new and improved intro, and I'm super excited for it because I think it's going to be bad ass. But anyways, I just wanted to let you know that it is coming soon and I didn't want to use the crappy one that I used last week, so we're just not going to have an intro this week.

Speaker 1:

Anyways, enjoy the episode. I love it. I hope you love it, but let me know your thoughts. Hey, hey, hey, babes, welcome back to another episode. I'm so happy that you're here and since you clicked on this episode, I'm super excited for you, because we're about to talk about is going to be a game changer for you.

Speaker 1:

If you tend to set really big goals for yourself, but then you struggle to follow through and to see them through to completion, then you are going to want to hear this today. First, I'm just going to say this it's actually not your fault, it's genuinely not your fault, that you have struggled to see your goals through. You probably haven't learned this about yourself yet. So what I'm going to be sharing with you today is a concept that I learned from my mindset coach, master, nlp practitioner, peter Shaw. I have an episode with him on how he rewired his brain to become a marathon runner and freaking love it when he used to hate running. It's really good. I think it's episode 12 or something. You can go back and listen to it if you want, but he's amazing. Love, love, love. Peter, he's the original person that put me on to mindset work and brain training and gosh, I have to attribute a huge portion of my healing journey to Peter because he taught me the feedback loop and, whether he's actually aware of it or not, he really helped me rewire so much when it comes to my mindset and my patterns. But anyways, this is the concept. I just wanted to give him credit. So you know, I didn't make this up. I didn't come up with this. I don't even know if he made it up, but he's the person that taught it to me, so I'm giving him credit.

Speaker 1:

So the concept is called hinging points. Hinging points are circumstances or cues for you to take a certain action or behave in a certain way. So maybe you've heard of the habit loop. If you have. This is going to sound really familiar, but the habit loop is basically there's a trigger or some kind of environmental cue that triggers a certain action or routine, which is followed by a reward, and then you repeat. It's like a loop Trigger, action, reward or cue, routine, reward. You might have heard it said either way, but that's the habit loop. Changing points are the first part of that loop. It's how you set up the trigger or the cue.

Speaker 1:

So this conversation was sparked by one of my friends, who's also a previous client. Back when I did health and wellness coaching for women, I had a health and wellness program called Bare, bold and Beautiful, or BBB. Some of you may remember this, some of you were in it. But she messaged me the other day and she was like hey, I just wanted to celebrate a win with you and give you props for all of the tools you provided me with during the BBB program. She said it was truly life-changing and it made it so much easier for her to hop back on the right path when she fell off. She shared a goal with me that her and a family member were starting a weight loss school together and they decided to make it fun by playing this game and adding in some accountability. So they set up a list of goals they wanted to follow through on before the specific date. They went through the list and made sure there wasn't anything unreasonable or unrealistic and it was things that they wanted to create habits for anyways and make a part of their lifestyle. So it wasn't like an extreme diet or an extreme anything, and the rules around it were they have to do everything on the list that they said they would do by the date that they set or they would have to pay each other $500.

Speaker 1:

And she was like Lacey, let me just tell you, I've never had an easier time being disciplined in my life. L-m-f-a-o. Have you ever done that before? She was like I've maintained my calorie deficit for 25 days now and I've really made it a point to be more active and hit the gym three days a week. She's so proud of herself. She's lost weight. And she was like I just really needed you to know that. You really gave me those tools and I'm forever grateful to you for that. And I was like oh my God, I love this so much. Bbb was so long ago, but my whole intention behind BBB from the start was to set you up with the tools and the know-how to create the lifestyle and the epic results that you want in a way that you can maintain them for the rest of your life. You can sustain them. You don't have to come back and hire me every few months or years, every time you have a new goal or every time you fall off track and you need to start back over. And this was just confirmation that those teachings and those tools really landed and helped my previous clients do exactly that. So it was so rewarding to hear that my previous clients do exactly that. So it was so rewarding to hear that.

Speaker 1:

But that conversation sparked this concept for me because I was like, ah, sounds like you discovered a hinging point. Remember, hinging points are circumstances or environmental cues that trigger you to take a certain action or behave in a certain way. So what I'm about to explain works really well with the health and the weight loss conversation, but this can apply to any area of your life, any lifestyle goal that you have or any ambition that you have for any area of your life, whether it be your health or your relationship or your career. So what I'm going to do first is I'm going to name off some of the hinging points that I see most often in people, and while I'm going through them, I just want you to listen and see if any of them resonate with you. Maybe you can think back to a time in your life where you're like, huh, that makes total sense. That really did make a difference in that experience for me. After I get done sharing these with you, what I'm going to share next is going to connect all the dots and you're going to be like, holy shit, new level unlocked. Your goals are about to be so much easier to reach. It's going to be way harder for you to get off track and you're going to be like Lacey I never knew that it could be this easy and this enjoyable. Where have you been all of my life? Okay, so here's the first one, in no particular order.

Speaker 1:

By the way, one of the most common hinging points that I see is community. People who have community as a hinging point, they tend to be more motivated and more likely to follow through on a goal that they set for themselves. If they are taking the actions required with a friend or a group of people, these are the types of people who are not usually self-motivated. They probably do really well in group projects. They're usually the person who's just happy to be tagging along, like if we're all going to do yoga on the beach, I'm down, but I'm not doing that shit by myself. If we're all getting salads, I'll get a salad, but if everybody else is getting pasta, I'm getting pasta too. Or if I've got work to get done, but all my other coworkers are in the group conversation right now and I just have to be a part of it, work can wait. Those are my community people. If any of that resonates on any level, community might be one of your hinging points.

Speaker 1:

The second one I see all the time is competition. For people who have competition as a hinging point, they tend to be more motivated or more likely to follow through if there's some type of competition involved. They really enjoy taking the action if it's gamified in some way. So if you resonate with this, then you might identify as a high achiever. You probably did really well in sports or school or really anything where there's some competitive nature to it. You may not enjoy working in groups. You may prefer to work solo. You might thrive off of activities or careers or jobs and roles where you're rewarded for personal performance. You might stick to your gym routine and your nutrition habits if you're competing against someone or if there's some type of recognition for the winner. You might run faster if you sign up for a 5k instead of just going out for a run around the neighborhood. You might perform better at work if you had some type of competition with your co-workers about who could get the most sales or do better at whatever right. You set your own rules and regulations.

Speaker 1:

For people who have accountability as a hinging point. They tend to be more motivated or more likely to follow through if someone is checking in on them making sure that they did that thing they said they were going to do. This one is personally my top hinging point. People with this hinging point may or may not enjoy working in groups, but they typically thrive when someone is looped into the idea and holding them to their word. So maybe that's someone checking in and saying, hey, did you work out today? That's not what you planned to eat. Are you sure you want to do that? Is that supporting your goals? Or hey, you told me to check in with you. If I haven't heard from you by this date and time, have you finished that thing yet? What's your status? Sometimes just having someone to answer to is motivation enough to get the thing done, so that you don't come to them empty-handed or you don't feel like you're letting them down or disappointing them for not getting it done. Let me know if you resonate with that one too. Okay, the next one that I see all the time Convenience.

Speaker 1:

For people who have convenience as a hinging point, they are not typically self-motivated. They are more likely to follow through if the action or the routine is the obvious or easy choice, an effortless yes. So going to the gym isn't out of the way. It's not a long commute, you don't have to get up and pack your bag and get all the things ready and making the right food choices I mean based on whatever your goals are are easy, effortless, convenient. Doing the work is convenient. It would be more inconvenient to not do the work than to just do it. You would have to go more out of your way To not do the thing Than to just freaking do it.

Speaker 1:

So people who have convenience as a hinging point, they really thrive when they really go the extra mile and spend the extra attention and care to set themselves up, and they fall off really easy when detours or roadblocks come up, if they have a long day at work or something and they get off later than planned. Oh, I didn't have the food set out to thaw or the ingredients prepped. I'm too tired to put it all together now, so I'm just going to pick up some fast food on the way home or I'm going to skip the gym tonight. I don't even have my clothes ready. I've got to go all the way home and get changed and do this and do that, so I'm just going to skip. Or I had a rough morning so I'm just going to take it easy at work today, not going to get as much done, I'm just going to give myself an easy day, whatever right.

Speaker 1:

I think we all have this as a hinging point to a degree, some people more than others. That's another big one. And then the last one I'm going to share and I see all the time is pressure. People who have pressure as a hinging point tend to be more motivated and more likely to get shit done if there is some sense of urgency, like a deadline, or there's something on the line. If this one resonates with you, you probably use the full amount of time that you are given to get something done, whether it be two months or two days, even if that thing only takes two hours. But you're given two days or two months, you probably take the full amount of time to get that thing done, because you have no sense of urgency, you have no pressure to get that thing done until the very last minute.

Speaker 1:

People who have pressure as a hinging point tend to struggle with procrastination, but they also tend to thrive under pressure. If this applies to you, you may have been referred to as clutch a time or two in your life, or a pressure performer. It doesn't mean that you always thrive under pressure, and it doesn't mean that people who don't have pressure as a hinging point don't ever thrive under pressure. It's just something that you're more likely to see if this is one of your big hinging points. But having heard all of those, do any of them stand out to you? Do you see any of them in yourself? I'm about to tie it all together here for you.

Speaker 1:

The key to not ever having to look yourself in the mirror with disappointment in your eyes because you did not follow through on your goal yet again is to learn your hinging points, and yes, you can have more than one. You want to learn your top two to three hinging points so that you can recreate those circumstances over and over again every time you set out to reach a new goal. So maybe a few of those resonated for you while I was describing them, but I'm going to take you through a little visualization exercise so that you can easily figure out what your hinging points are, because those aren't the only hinging points. Those are ones that we see often, that are very obvious, but there are dozens and dozens of hinging points. So here's what you're going to do I'm going to tell you what you're going to do and then we're going to pause the episode so you can visualize, and then you'll come back so I can tie it all up in a bow for you and it all makes sense.

Speaker 1:

So what you're going to do is you're going to think back to a time when you were absolutely thriving in life, or a time when you crushed the fuck out of a goal that you set for yourself. You're going to think about that time in your life. You're going to try to remember details from it. Who was there? What did your surroundings look like? What were your circumstances at the time? However you interpret that, what were the steps you took or the key factors that played into your success? Did you have friends or family cheering you on or doing it with you? Did you have someone on your ass holding you accountable every step of the way? Was there a reward or a consequence at stake? Did it feel easy and effortless, or was there some sense of urgency for some reason or another? Any detail that you can think of that played into your success for that goal or during that time in your life when life was good, you were thriving, feeling good on top of the world.

Speaker 1:

All right, go ahead and pause right now and think about it. All right, if you've unpaused, then I'm assuming you have your memory. All right, now you're going to pause again and you're going to think of another time, another goal you absolutely crushed, or another time in your life when you were absolutely thriving. Pause, and then unpause when you have it. Okay, now, you've got two memories. Now, if you really want to learn yourself so that you never, ever, ever, ever, ever quit or fall off track again, I'm going to ask you to pause one more time and think of a third memory. Go, do it now. Okay, now, what were the common factors? Start naming them, whatever they were, for every single goal you ever have for yourself. Moving forward, you are going to incorporate those hinging points into your strategy and you're going to create the circumstances which you know you thrive in. You're literally going to set yourself up in this way to succeed, because setting yourself up is half the battle and not preparing to succeed is preparing to fail. So really think about these and start thinking of ways that you can incorporate them into your everyday life, not just your goals, but your everyday life, so that you're always thriving and succeeding and living on top of the world.

Speaker 1:

If community was one of your top three, join a mastermind or a Facebook group or a local group of people who are doing the same thing that you're wanting to do or working towards the same goal that you have. If competition was one of your top hinging points, get yourself onto Google University and find a local competition, or even something that you can travel to and make a trip out of it. Give yourself something to work towards, to train for. Or you can set your own rewards or consequences up for state, like, if I accomplish this goal, then I get to go buy the new top that I want or new whatever. I get to go have this experience. I don't know Whatever excites you. Or if I don't follow through, then I have to give away this money or announce an embarrassing fact to a room full of people. I don't know If accountability was one of your top ones, get your ass a coach or an accountability partner at the least.

Speaker 1:

But it needs to be someone who's as serious as you are. It can't be a friend who's going to be like oh, take it easy, girl, you deserve a break. Or who, if you don't check in, they're not going to check in with you to be like, hey, why didn't you check in today? This isn't somebody who's going to dance around your feelings. I'm not saying to get somebody who's going to be a hard ass's going to let you have a day or a week off when you said that you were going to do this thing or you were going to make this change. I think this typically works better.

Speaker 1:

When you're paying someone because there's skin in the game or something at stake, you're like I've got to get my money's worth. I've got to make this before something, otherwise it was a waste or I just threw that money down the drain. But if you can find someone or some way to hold yourself accountable, then definitely grab onto that. And because this is my top hinging point, I also find it helpful when I have something to work towards. Do I like working out? Yes. Do I like having a healthy lifestyle? Yes. Do I like making a lot of money? Yes. But I'm more motivated to show up and to follow through if I'm working towards a certain goal, like I want to train for this half marathon or I want to hit this money goal so I can take this trip or buy this thing, like there's some end goal to it. I spent a little more time on that one because it's my top one.

Speaker 1:

But if convenience is one of your top hinging points, you can set yourself up by setting yourself up Like there's no simpler way to say that. Set your clothes out the night before, prep all your ingredients or prep your meals on grocery day, batch it. Actually have a plan. Know that if you don't give yourself a plan, then you're planning to fail. That simple. And if pressure is one of your top hinging points, this might sound counterintuitive, but you're going to take a load of pressure and stress off of your shoulders if you stop giving yourself so much time and so much space and flexibility to accomplish whatever it is that you're trying to accomplish. If you know you're a pressure performer and you need a deadline or you need a sense of urgency, don't start a project two months before it's due or before you want to get it done. Think about how long it's going to realistically take you and if that's two days, then give yourself only two days. Or create a deadline for yourself If it's a personal goal and there's no true deadline, like you don't have to turn something into someone else, it doesn't affect anybody else but you then create a fake deadline and give it to yourself or put something on the line.

Speaker 1:

The money scenario that I told you my friend and past client used it kind of applies to multiple categories. It can apply to competition, it can apply to accountability. It can apply to competition, it can apply to accountability and it can apply to pressure, and you're going to notice that a lot of hinging points overlap in some ways. But the reason I wanted you to visualize so many different memories is so you can start to see kind of what the patterns are for you and how do they specifically apply to you. So I hope this is hitting for you. This changed the game for me.

Speaker 1:

I've never not had a coach since hiring Peter back in 2021. And I have an accountability partner that I talk to every single night before I go to bed. We share what we did that day and we share our goals and plans for the next day and for me, just having someone be like Lacey did you do what you said you were going to do, like knowing that that's coming, is motivation enough for me to get my ass on it. And then there's times where competition and pressure are really supportive for me, but there's also situations and scenarios where competition and pressure actually work against me. So it's knowing these things about yourself and knowing when they apply, when they support you and when they hinder you oh, it's such a game changer. But I promise, once you learn these things about yourself and start applying them to your journey in every single way and setting yourself up for success by creating these circumstances in everything that you do, your life is going to change. You will never not follow through on a goal, ever again Trust. But, oh my gosh, thanks so much for tuning in today.

Speaker 1:

If you loved this episode, let me know your favorite takeaway. Find me over on Instagram at Boldy Lacey or at Badass Mindset Podcast. Both of them are in the show notes so you know exactly how to spell it and how to find me, or you can hit the link at the top of the show notes. Share what your top hinging points are and a goal that you're working on, and maybe I can help come up with ideas on how to incorporate them into your strategy. Or I can be your accountability or your competition if that's one of your things.

Speaker 1:

All right, babe, have an amazing day and I will see you again next week. Thank you so much for being here and, queen, give yourself a high five for showing up and committing to be the best version of yourself for you and your people. You are such a badass for that. If you got anything good from this episode, would you send the love back by DMing me on Instagram at boldly Lacey, letting me know exactly which part resonated with you? These types of messages empower me to keep showing up, and they also help me understand the types of conversations you really care about. All right, bestie, we'll talk again soon, but for now, it's time for you to step up and start being the badass that we both know you are.